Dear Ego, I’m Writing To Tell You That…

Dear Ego, I’m writing to tell you that I no longer want to be with you. I know this is going to crush you, but I just don’t think we’re a good match and we would be better off going our separate ways.

It’s not that we haven’t had some good times together – we have – but they’ve been times that you can’t really share with others. Winning an argument, gloating over our high exam scores, or showing off in front of our friends – they may have felt good at the time, but they didn’t bring us any peace in the long run.

Then there’s the bad times, and boy have there been plenty of those. The way you rile me up when someone is attacking me or putting me down, the sense of despair you get when we’re facing a potential bump in the road, the way you’re always picking holes in my appearance, or the doubt you cast in my mind over what other people think of me.

This is just the tip of the iceberg too – you’ve got a pretty downbeat character and, quite frankly, I’ve had enough of it.

I want joy and contentment in my life and I just don’t think you want the same. If we can’t both have what we want when we’re together, the only solution, as far as I can see, is to split up.

You’ve told me before that you can change, but I’ve seen no evidence of it whatsoever. In fact, whenever I try and bring it up, you shut me down. I’m not sure you’ll ever be able to change because you are so stubborn and so defensive that you’d rather live a life of fear and doubt rather than risk a different approach.

And don’t presume to tell me that I’m rushing into this decision – I’m not. It’s been pretty clear to me for quite some time that our relationship has been on rocky grounds. I don’t enjoy your company anymore and I prefer spending time without you clinging on to my arm.

The truth is we’ve been drifting apart for ages; I’m not even sure when it all started, but I can say for certain that it’s a one way process and we’re only going to get more and more distant.

So, what’s the point in delaying the inevitable? A clean break now and we can both be happier. You can do whatever you want to do, and I’ll do what I want to do; what feels right in my very being.

I don’t want to feel stifled by your presence, I don’t want to sense your judging eyes looking at me as if I’m doing something wrong all the time. Why do you even do that? Are you afraid I’m going to show you up by doing something embarrassing? So what if I do; it’s not going to kill me to be a bit silly from time to time.

No, my mind’s made up – we’re over. You can tell me I’ll regret this as much as you like; you can tell me I won’t cope when you’re not around, but I know better now.

In fact, I cope fantastically well when you’re not there; it’s like opening my eyes to a world of possibilities that I’ve been otherwise blind to. I can sense these connections between myself and everything around me and I can only assume that you’ve previously blocked them from reaching me so that you can have my complete attention.

I don’t know about you, but that doesn’t sound like something someone in a healthy relationship would do.

That’s all I want to say about it; I don’t want any drama because it won’t change the outcome. I just want you to go and be whatever it is you want to be.

In time, I’m sure you’ll come to see this as the right decision; we can’t move forward as we are and I don’t want to be held back by you any longer. I really hate to hurt you, but believe me when I tell you that it’s for the best.

You have played such a major role in my life so far and I wouldn’t be where I am today without you; for that I am eternally grateful. But now it’s time for a new chapter.

I will always remember you.

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