How To Be The Best Version Of Yourself: 20 No Bullsh*t Tips!

We all know that one friend on Instagram who’s constantly ‘living their best life.’

But what does that actually mean – and how can you do it too?

Being the best version of ourselves means something different to everyone, but here are our top tips on maximizing the good things in your life, being happy with what you have, and working toward your goals…

1. Figure out where you are.

Make a note of where you’re at in your life.

This is a great way to start any kind of self-improvement journey and will come in handy later down the line.

Think about physical and emotional aspects of your life, and be brutally honest.

This is for just you to read, so keep it somewhere safe and secure – online and password-protected, for example. 

2. Figure out where you want to be.

Envision your best self – think about how they feel and act, how they react to what goes on around them.

Maybe they’re braver and bolder than you feel now.

Maybe they’re calmer and more mellow than you feel now.

Either way, consider what the best version of yourself looks like, feels like, acts like, and use that as a guide during this journey. 

3. Adjust your goals.

You might change your goals as you go, and that is fine!

It doesn’t mean you’ve ‘failed’ this task or that you’re indecisive.

It just means that you’re self-aware and are adapting your ambitions based on your feelings about the steps you are taking. 

4. Do some research.

It’s always a good idea to look at what other people are doing, how other people are managing their journeys, and to look for tips on achieving your version of success.

Maybe your best self is a florist, not an accountant like you are now – you may have zero idea of how to get there but you know you want it.

So, research!

Look for blogs, message people on Instagram who became florists after a massive career change and ask how they did it.

Most people are happy to help, so be open-minded, get on Google and keep working toward whatever it is you want. 

5. Aim high; stay grounded.

So – you’re working toward the best version of yourself, but it’s important to stay in-tune with who you already are!

Don’t lose sight of what you have, just because you’re really excited to take the next steps.

Your loved ones know you and care about you as you are, so take them on this journey with you.

Remember to stay humble – it’s easy to get carried away when you’re so focused on becoming a shiny new version of yourself, but remember the people who’ve always supported you. 

6. Seek help if you need to.

Don’t be scared to look outward for support.

A lot of us – especially those of us who are really ambitious – think we have to do everything on our own.

We’re so keen to get to the finish line, or the next step, that we don’t want anyone or anything slowing us down.

It’s okay to reach out to a counselor if you’re having a hard time with the parts of yourself you want to change.

It’s a healthy idea to chat to a life coach or a professional in whatever it is you fancy giving a go.

Be open to insight and ask for support if things get challenging – that’s a sign of strength, not weakness! 

7. Work on your challenges.

Think about what is holding you back – it could be external or internal – and make a list.

Go through the list and work out what is within your control to change.

Maybe someone else is making you feel bad about yourself and you feel like that is holding you back from being your best self.

Can you stop being friends with them? Then do it!

If you can’t (if they’re family, for example, and you’re not comfortable cutting ties), work out how you can manage your interactions with them.

If you know you struggle to keep calm in a crisis, but your best self is someone who is cool as a cucumber, aim for that.

Work on that inner limitation of jumping to conclusions or getting stressed out.

Being the best version of yourself doesn’t mean you have no flaws.

It does mean you’re working toward lessening those flaws and the impact they have on how you feel and live. 

8. Streamline for success.

Get into the mindset that everything should be intentional – don’t do things for the sake of it.

Strip your life of all the negative things and start with a blank slate.

Of course, you may have to keep in some things that you feel are ‘negative,’ like going to work, but overall, you can take steps to eliminate the ‘bad’ bits of your daily life.

Make a list of those things as you may want to come back to them later down the line.

So, you might need to work your current job for now, but you can stick it on your to-do list and apply for other jobs when the time is right.

By getting rid of things that drag you down and toxic elements of your life, your mind will have so much extra space and energy to focus on all the good things you’re doing. 

9. Keep a diary or journal.

It can be easy to look back at yourself a month ago and feel like not much has changed, which is why keeping tabs on everything will really help.

The more you track your progress, the more you’ll feel inclined to keep going.

Don’t be afraid to keep track of the negative feelings that come up too.

You may start to identify some patterns (e.g. every day that I try to work on my patience, I go to bed feeling very frustrated), which can help you anticipate how you’ll feel after a certain activity.

That means, next time you set a day aside to work on your patience, you can make sure you’ve got some wine chilling in the fridge as a reward afterwards. 

10. Celebrate every tiny victory.

This can feel like a long journey, and working on ourselves can be difficult.

That’s why it’s so important to celebrate the little things.

Maybe you’ve acknowledged areas for improvement in yourself – this can be quite challenging and takes some courage, so celebrate once you’ve done it.

It can be small things – some fancy chocolate, a long bath, a candlelit dinner, or a Netflix marathon.

The more you celebrate each step you take, the more you’ll start to associate personal growth with positive things.

This will motivate you to keep going any time it feels hard. 

11. Manifest that sh*t! 

We’re talking vision boards, mantras, daily intentions, and everything in-between.

The more you visualize what your best self looks like, the more attainable it will feel, and the more motivation you’ll have while you work toward it.

Inspirational quotes, chants in the morning to your reflection in the mirror… do whatever feels right and go with the flow on this one.

Think your best self into existence and channel all your energy into becoming who you really want to be. 

12. Document your progress.

Set up an Instagram page – it can be a private one – to showcase your growth.

This is a great way for you to keep track of how much you’re doing and how far you’ve come.

You can post little photos and videos of each new activity you tackle.

If you choose to make this account public, you’ll have the chance to interact with other people on a similar journey – follow some relevant accounts, get commenting on other people’s posts and share the love! 

13. Limit negativity.

This is all about acknowledging aspects of your current self that you might not like, and working out how to reduce the level of control and influence they have on your life.

For example, if you hate the fact that you’re always late and want to work on this, take steps to reduce how much this impacts you.

Turn up on time, turn up 10 minutes early, set 3 alarms, whatever it takes.

Gain some control over the things you can and you’ll be well on-track to eliminating them from your life. 

14. Organize a skill exchange.

Host a workshop with your close friends and share your skills.

This will help you feel more confident in the things you already know how to do, and will be a great way to bond with friends, and even friends of friends.

In exchange, ask them each to share a skill.

You can take it in turns to host little workshops, sharing something you enjoy and giving advice to those who are unsure of themselves.

It could be anything from putting together a budget to hosting a belly-dancing workshop! 

15. Head to a class.

If you’ve not got a huge group of friends, or feel a bit shy about trying new things in front of people you know, head to a community class.

This is a great way to expand your skills and work on your confidence.

You’ll also meet like-minded people who want to learn the same things as you, which will help you fuel your passion for this journey.

It will also give you a safe space to ask for support from those experiencing the same thing as you. 

16. Practice meditation.

Use meditation as a tool during this journey – set your intention, breathe into your body and soul, and channel that energy into whatever your next steps are.

Meditating offers us a space to realign ourselves with what we want; to sit with our feelings and think about how to take the next steps and overcome any challenges we face.

Be present in the moment and be positive about the future…

17. Get plenty of rest.

Working on yourself takes up a lot of energy, so don’t be alarmed if you’re feeling quite tired!

You might be awakening different parts of your mind that you haven’t used for a while, or you may be more in-tune with your feelings and wishes, which may feel a bit exhausting at first.

This is totally normal and just means you need to factor in a bit of extra downtime for yourself. 

18. Experiment and embrace.

Part of becoming our best selves is learning what we love – and then finding ways to do it more.

Trying new things is such a good way to take a step toward becoming the best version of yourself.

You might find a love for salsa dancing that makes you incredibly happy that you’d never have known about without a gentle nudge to do it.

Consider this article your nudge – and get out there and do something you’ve never done before!

The more you experiment and the broader your activities, the more likely you are to find things you love – and the closer you get to being your best self. 

19. Don’t be too critical.

It can be easy to think that becoming the best version of yourself means letting go of any parts of yourself you don’t like.

For some people, that may mean never doing sports again because they feel like they’re rubbish at them.

During this journey of self-reflection, it’s easy to become critical of yourself for not being perfect at everything.

Nobody is amazing at everything they try, so just keep going with what makes you feel good and learn to love the parts of you that might not feel 100% perfect all the time. 

20. Chat to loved ones.

Communicating with your loved ones is key here – they’ll help remind you that the bits you might not like don’t need to change as much as you might think they do.

They are there to give you support, a confidence boost, and a massive cheer (and hug!) as you smash your goals and overcome any obstacles along the journey to becoming the best version of yourself.

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About Author

Lucy is a travel and wellness writer currently based in Gili Air, a tiny Indonesian island. After over a year of traveling, she’s settled in paradise and spends her days wandering around barefoot, practicing yoga and exploring new ways to work on her wellbeing.