A trustworthy person is a special person to have around.
It goes without saying, but they are someone you can trust 100%. Someone who you know will be there for you without question.
It’s when we think we’ve found a trustworthy person who doesn’t actually deserve the title that we get hurt and feel let down.
True trustworthy friends are few and far between, and once you find one, you should do everything you can to keep that relationship strong.
To know if you’re lucky enough to have one of those special people in your life, or to work out if someone really is deserving of the title, keep reading to see some of the most common traits this type of person has.
1. They are consistent.
These are the people you can count on. They won’t disappear on you suddenly, or change their mind randomly. You’ve never seen them behave erratically or without purpose.
If they say they’re going to show up, you know that they will. There’s no question of them changing their mind last minute or forgetting; and if they do, you know that something is seriously wrong.
You know where you stand with them and where their boundaries are. They are consistent in all things: their character, their behavior, their opinions, and most importantly, showing up for you if you need them.
2. They come through on their promises.
Most of us have been guilty of making a promise that we can’t keep. Maybe you made a flippant remark; a promise you didn’t take seriously at the time.
This won’t be the case with a truly trustworthy person. If they’ve committed to doing something for you, you can be sure that it will be done, even if you never really expected them to go through with it.
Trustworthy people take their commitments seriously, and they’ll do whatever they can to make things happen. If they make you a promise, they’re going to go through with it.
3. They aren’t people pleasers.
A typical people pleaser is someone who hates to say no and will end up saying yes to everyone because they don’t like to let people down.
This behavior is unsustainable and means that they often do have to let people down, usually in a way that hurts more because they said yes to try to keep them happy.
A trustworthy person won’t do this to you. If they can’t manage to get somewhere or meet you at a certain time and place, they will be up front about it.
There are no hidden surprises. You know that they will always be honest with you and take a practical approach to life. If they can’t or don’t want to do something, they’ll tell you and won’t leave it till the last minute to not show up.
It’s part of what makes you trust them, because you always know where you stand.
4. They always show their true selves.
When a person put’s on a mask or an act in order to fit in with others or win their favor, you have to question their trustworthiness.
After all, how do you know who they truly are underneath it all if they rarely ever show it?
A trustworthy person is willing to be their authentic self at all times, even if that means some people won’t like them. They are who they are they don’t place any value on the judgments of others.
You can trust this person to be who they are; to be honest and real. This is a wonderful trait to have.
5. They’re brutally honest.
There are times when you might have to tell someone something they don’t want to hear.
It takes someone you can trust to be able to tell you something that’s difficult to hear, because they know it will be better for you in the long run.
These types of people are rare; those who will risk the brunt of your reaction for your own good, taking the chance that you will blame them for being the one to tell you a truth you’d rather ignore.
It’s precisely because of the risk that this person is willing to take for you that you can be sure they’re trustworthy.
Most other people would rather avoid the hard conversations. But you can count on this friend to always be honest with you, even if it’s something you don’t want to hear.
6. They don’t gossip.
You won’t find these people huddling around the coffee machine at work or letting something slip after a few glasses of wine. A trustworthy person stays out of gossip circles.
If you get involved in gossip, even when you think what you’re saying is harmless, a small part of you has to wonder: if you’re talking to people who are willing to share someone else’s secret with you, can you really trust them not to share yours?
When you know a person avoids gossip and doesn’t spread stories, you can feel confident that if you share something private with them, it will stay just between the two of you.
Being thought of as trustworthy all depends on the amount of trust people are willing to put in someone. Seeing them stay out of gossip circles creates not only a sense of trust that whatever you say to them won’t go any further, but it demonstrates their maturity and shows they would rather avoid getting caught up in unnecessary drama.
You’ll find yourself naturally being drawn to them in confidence because you know you can trust them and that they aren’t just looking for the next office scandal.
7. They respect your boundaries.
Trust is integral to relationships, romantic or otherwise. The best kind of relationship is one where you can trust without question that this person won’t end up hurting you or letting you down, and they won’t overstep your boundaries.
Trustworthy people will take your boundaries seriously. If you say no, they won’t try to convince you to change your mind.
When someone tries to push your boundaries or doesn’t take them seriously, they risk hurting you emotionally as they ignore a personal choice that is meaningful to you.
Once a person crosses that line and chooses to do something they know you’ll be uncomfortable with, it’s hard to know where that behavior will stop and how far they’d be willing to push and upset you.
A trustworthy person will respect your boundaries. They won’t question your choices or try to make you change your mind.
8. They are reliable.
You’ll struggle to think of a time you’ve ever been let down by this person. If you want to know if someone is trustworthy, start by noticing if they follow through on their commitments.
Come rain or shine, they will be where they’ve said they’ll be at the time you both agreed. You won’t ever need to question whether or not they’ll do what they’ve been asked, because they always will.
They aren’t known for being late or flakey and you can always trust that they’ll be there for you if you’ve asked them to be.
9. They’re vulnerable around you.
It takes a lot of trust to feel comfortable with being vulnerable around someone and sharing details about yourself you wouldn’t want others to hear.
You might share more with certain people than others. But a real sign of a trustworthy friendship is if that person can be vulnerable around you too.
If this person comes to you for advice or entrusts you with something private that they wouldn’t want others to know, then you know that they respect you and value your friendship.
If they’re willing to open up to you, it shows that they appreciate the trust it takes to be vulnerable around someone, too, and understand how it would feel to be betrayed in this way.
Knowing this, they’re more likely to value your trust and keep anything between you private. They’re a trustworthy friend to have because they expect the same loyalty back from you that you give to them.
10. They own up to their mistakes and apologize where appropriate.
Trust isn’t only on show when a person does something the right way. It is also demonstrated when they make a mistake, maybe even annoying or hurting someone else in the process.
It’s at these times that they will stand up, admit their mistake, own their flaws, and give a heartfelt apology where appropriate.
To know that a person isn’t going to turn around and try to lay the blame at someone else’s feet is a sign that you can trust them. You can have confidence in their integrity and their willingness to take responsibility for their own actions.
11. They’re rational.
Trustworthy people are not the type to lose sight of the bigger picture.
Some people can become fixated on achieving a goal, so much so that they don’t see how it’s negatively affecting other parts of their life.
When someone becomes irrational and obsessive, their behavior can become erratic. They lose sense of where the boundaries are in normal life as they stop interacting with it.
Trustworthy people aren’t like this. You have trust in someone because of their dependability and solid presence. These are the people you can count on to be there when you need them and give balanced, thoughtful advice.
When someone is too caught up in any one thing and the balance in their life is thrown off, you can no longer trust them to have an opinion that isn’t compromised by their distraction.
If a person is trustworthy, it’s because they are a constant and rational influence who you can always rely on.
12. They listen to you.
You might not think that this is an exceptional trait to have, but that’s far from the truth.
Often, even when you think someone is listening, they’re not. Either they’re distracted or not really interested in what you have to say, or they impress their own experiences onto the situation and start making the conversation about themselves rather than focusing on you.
A trustworthy person will be thoughtful in their approach to the conversation and stay quiet until you’ve finished what you have to say. They will ask relevant questions and keep the focus on you.
They won’t try to compete with similar stories or talk over you. They know that to give the best advice and be the best friend, they need to be there for you and the way to do this is to fully engage with, and actually listen to, what you have to say.
13. They’re loyal through good times and bad.
You know someone is trustworthy when they can be there for you in the good times and the bad.
They aren’t just there when you have some exciting news, they will be the ones picking up the phone in the middle of the night when you’re upset too.
They may not always agree with you, but a good friend won’t abandon you in hard times, instead offering their support no matter what.
They aren’t a flakey fair-weather friend. These are the people who will stick by you through the good and the ugly and keep your confidence for as long as you need.
14. They’re willing to make a sacrifice.
It’s not always fun being the person that everyone goes to.
Not everything you share will be happy and positive, and having someone’s confidence can be a big responsibility at times.
Some people say they’re there for you, but are nowhere to be found when you’re at your worst and need some support.
A trustworthy friend is that person who will recognize if you are struggling and drop everything to be with you.
They will stay up into the night listening to you or drive across the country to be with you if that’s what you need from them.
They aren’t just in this friendship for the good times, they show their commitment by going that extra mile to be your support and help you through the difficult times too.
15. They give credit where it’s due.
You know you can trust someone when they rightfully share the limelight with others when praise and credit are being dished out.
This is especially relevant in work situations where multiple people contribute to a successful project. If a manager should try to heap praise on the trustworthy individual, they will immediately point out that it was a team effort and that everyone deserves the same credit, even if they led the team or contributed the most.
They know that a team is nothing without each and every member, and so they refuse to take more than their fair share of the praise.
In non-team scenarios, they are forthcoming with their credit and congratulations when someone else achieves something. They can be trusted to raise others up rather than only ever raising themselves up.
16. They put the interests of others on a par with their own.
Many people are self-centered much of the time. They focus on how a situation affects them, how they can express their thoughts and their feelings, and how they can get the attention and recognition they seek.
To be truly trustworthy, you have to have a more balanced focus. You have to put the needs and interests of other people on the same level as your own. You have to be aware of your self-orientation and shift it to a more fair and equitable position whenever it gets too high.
Why? Because the other person will want to know that they can trust you to do right by them and not just do the thing that will benefit you the most.
When you’re doing a deal with someone, for instance, you will feel more positively toward it when you feel you can trust the other person not to screw you over.
If you’re not sure if someone is trustworthy or not, chances are that they’re not.
You don’t have to question if you trust a trustworthy person, you know that they have your trust and respect without even having to think about it.
They’re there on your best days and your worst; they’re the people you call in a crisis. They’re the person you tell something to first because you know they won’t breathe a word unless you say they can.
It’s not just about being able to trust this person with a secret. With a trustworthy person you’re willing to trust them with your happiness and well-being.
If you have to think twice, this person is not your person. We have people in our lives for different purposes and not everyone can be the person closest to you, whose opinion you value above others.
A trustworthy person is someone to keep close, because they are the ones you know will be honest and there for you in the ways you need most.
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- 10 Signs Of An Untrustworthy Person
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- How To Trust Yourself: 20 No Bullsh*t Tips!
- 7 Things Loyalty Really Means In A Relationship
- 25 Qualities Of A Good Friend: People You Can Really Count On