When you think about the things that have excited you in the past, you likely remember them quite clearly and fondly. You may recall the butterflies you had in your stomach when you went on a date with someone you really liked, or how amazing it was to see things like the Eiffel Tower or the Parthenon firsthand — especially if you’d looked forward to seeing them for years.
If your passion for life has faded, however, those butterflies have likely flown off, and things like those listed below no longer excite you, nor bring you real joy anymore.
1. Tasty food.
Most of us have at least a few favorite dishes that we look forward to enjoying on a regular basis, whether it’s Friday night pizza and chicken wings or a meal at a fancy restaurant on special occasions like birthdays and anniversaries. In my case, my partner and I reward ourselves with sushi after we’ve gotten boring house chores done, and we mark anniversaries with fancy cheeses and charcuterie boards.
If your passion for life has faded, however, you likely don’t care much about what you eat anymore: it may even feel like most things turn to ash in your mouth, or that you’re only eating to stave off hunger pangs. Food is a necessary expense at this point — not a joy.
2. Fun pursuits.
Just about everyone you meet has a hobby or other pursuit that brings them joy. One person might collect memorabilia, while another might paint, play music, build models, or do some kind of craft. These pursuits keep people engaged and bring them little bursts of joy, whether it’s discovering a new item or completing a project they’ve poured a lot of time and care into.
If you’re feeling like your passion for life has greyed out, though, you may find that you have a lot of half-finished projects lying around. Your musical instruments, favorite films, and tools are gathering dust, and you don’t really care. All you have the energy to do is binge-watch a comfort show for the 20th time and scroll on your phone for hours before you finally pass out.
3. Travel.
Most of us have a variety of travel destinations on our bucket lists: places we’d love to visit and explore before it’s time for us to slough off the mortal coil, so to speak. In fact, a lot of people have vision boards and/or savings accounts dedicated to travel so they can plan and fund their trips as efficiently (and excitingly) as possible.
If you find that you can’t be arsed about travelling farther than the couch, and you don’t daydream about faraway places anymore, that’s another sign that your life passions have cooled and you’re simply plodding through existence, rather than enjoying it.
4. Sex.
Considering the fact that sex is the driving force behind our species’ continued existence, a healthy sex drive is a solid sign that things are pretty okay in your life. Maybe you feel a giddy little flutter when your partner steps out of the shower, or you daydream about how your weekend date might unfold. These pleasant rumblings let you know that you still have a lust for life (quite literally).
In contrast, if your sex drive has completely died on you and your “fun stuff” box is covered in cobwebs, this signals that your general passion for life has either faded or is en route to getting to that point. Depression and general malaise both dampen a person’s sex drive exponentially, so if a Victoria’s Secret model or shirtless Henry Cavill makes you go “meh”, your kindling has certainly gotten damp. Or not, as the case may be.
5. Creativity.
For many people, some type of creative endeavor is something they look forward to doing on a regular basis. In fact, it may be a driving force for a lot of people. One person might spend their free time practicing guitar and composing new songs, while others may paint, code, carve wood, write, or bake.
When someone’s passion for life has faded, creativity is one of the first things to fall by the wayside. Depression and despondency dampen the creative drive, and you may not feel like there’s any point to doing “frivolous” things like spattering paint around.
Plus, it stands to reason that if you’ve lost your appetite, you won’t be inclined to be creative in the kitchen. Similarly, if you usually find joy in creative writing, the difficulties you’re facing in your daily life may not be terribly conducive to fun storytelling.
6. Achievement.
When a person who has always been a Type-A achiever suddenly doesn’t see the point in putting effort towards anything, that’s a massive about-face for them. After all, they may have interwoven their overall sense of self with their lifelong achievements — so if they aren’t motivated to pursue and attain new goals anymore, what does that say about them?
Well, it says that they’re likely in survival mode, and the fire that’s normally lit beneath them to accomplish new, great things has sputtered down to a barely smoldering coal. The future isn’t an exciting place for them anymore, and as such, they have no great desire to plan for it.
7. Dates and relationships.
Dating and relationships aren’t all about sex: they’re also about getting to know new people, and potentially cultivating deeper connections with them. It’s exciting to meet someone new and find out all about the things that inspire them, make them happy, etc. This is especially true when you find out that you have a lot in common with someone, since you can share all kinds of ideas, fun facts, and activities with a person who actually understands you.
When your passion for life fades, however, the optimism about these potential sparks simply doesn’t matter anymore. You have neither the energy to devote to another human being, nor the wherewithal to even try. Anything and anyone that requires time and effort isn’t worth the investment to you anymore — especially if you have to deal with drama, misunderstandings, and potential social faux pas. It’s simply easier to rot on the couch alone.
8. Future plans.
When a person has a significant amount of joie de vivre, they usually have a long list of things they want to do or experience in the future. Some may have a bucket list of global locations they’d like to visit, while others might want to buy and renovate old farmhouses, start animal sanctuaries, go skydiving, and so on.
When that passion for life fades, these goals and aspirations disappear. They simply don’t seem to matter anymore. If this is how you’ve been feeling, you likely don’t care if you experience these things or not — even if they’re still attainable. In fact, you might even wonder why they mattered to you to begin with.
Final thoughts…
With everything that’s going on in the world right now, it’s understandable that a lot of people are feeling sad and despondent. Most folks are struggling in some way, stuck in survival mode, and just trying to get through each day. It’s hard to maintain passion for life when things feel really dire.
Try to remain as present as possible, and don’t be afraid to seek help when and if you feel that you need it. Things may seem awful right now, but you don’t have to battle these shadows alone.
