Gender aside, human beings, in general, are pretty hard to read when it comes to attraction. We’re all guilty of giving off mixed signals and being incapable of reading signs from other people. We’re particularly terrible at it when our judgement is clouded by little hearts swimming in front of our eyes when we look at someone we really fancy.
Admittedly, though, at times the signals us girls give off can be particularly hard to decipher, even though we think we’re making things blatantly obvious to the guy we’re into. Although, to be honest guys, understanding your agenda isn’t exactly a picnic either.
Whether you like her and aren’t sure whether she’d say yes if you asked her out, or you’ve already been out, but you’re not sure whether she’s keen to carry things on, reading a girl can be a bit of a minefield.
Struggling to crack the code? Here are a few telltale signs that she’s into you.
1. You Catch Her Looking At You
When we like a guy, we’ll end up watching him a lot whether we like it or not, and we probably won’t be that good at hiding it. If you look at her and catch her staring, that’s a good sign.
On the other hand, and because we’re nothing if not contrary, another sign (especially if nothing has happened between you yet) is that she literally never looks at you. She’ll studiously avoid your gaze because she doesn’t want to be too obvious.
2. And She Looks FOR You
If she comes into a room and knows you’re going to be there, watch to see if her eyes seek you out when she arrives. Even if she doesn’t come over to you and goes to her friends instead, the fact she’s checking to see if you’re there is a very good sign, as it means you’ve been on her mind.
3. She Starts Treating You Differently
If you’ve known her for a while as a friend and she’s suddenly developed feelings for you, she’d have to be an incredible actor to stop her behavior toward you from changing.
If you had quite a close, affectionate relationship before and she suddenly stops touching you or starts treating you differently to the way she does other guys you both know, something’s probably up.
4. She Replies To Your Messages
Again, this will vary from girl to girl, but generally, if we like someone, we’ll message them back pretty quickly.
That’s unless you’ve got into the dreaded ‘game’ of only replying after three days and feigning disinterest, in which case she’ll stick to that because most girls don’t want to seem like the ‘keen’ one.
Although some people thrive off these games, most girls don’t have time for them. If you keep playing, she’ll probably lose interest pretty quickly, so for the love of god stop messing around and message her back.
5. She Seems Nervous
When you first meet up, does she get a little tongue-tied? Struggle to come up with topics of conversation? Not quite know how to greet you? Should it be a handshake? A hug? A kiss on the cheek? A kiss on both cheeks? Or does she just stand there awkwardly?
If a girl likes you, she’ll have butterflies in her stomach when she first sees you, and that might mean her brain takes a short holiday. She should soon relax into your company, but initial nerves are a sure sign she likes you.
6. She’s Touchy-feely
Some girls are uncomfortable with contact in public, so this doesn’t always apply, but generally, if she’s into you, she’ll find ways to touch you, even if they’re only small gestures. Touching your arm is definitely a good clue, as it’s deliberate and surprisingly intimate.
There’s nothing more infuriating than parting ways with a guy you like without any clear idea of when you’re seeing each other next. If she’s not bothered about seeing you again, she’ll probably keep things vague, but if she’s interested in you, she might suggest certain days or times she’s free for another date.
Make sure you take her up on one of them if you can and pin down a plan, or she might think you’re not interested in meeting up again and go off the boil.
Having set plans gives her the reassurance she’s going to see you again, and means she doesn’t have to wait around for you to make a suggestion, which can get extremely tedious.
8. She Laughs And Smiles
If you know your jokes are bad and she’s still laughing at them, that’s an excellent sign. Being around a guy we like generally puts us in a good mood and can make us very giggly, so smiles and laughter are excellent.
Look for big toothy grins that make her eyes sparkle too, and you know you’re in with a chance.
9. She Makes Eye Contact With You
In western culture, we’re generally pretty terrible about making eye contact, so if we do meet someone’s eyes, it’s usually done very deliberately. Eye contact is surprisingly intimate, so if she meets your eyes and holds your gaze, that’s a very good sign.
10. Her Body Is Turned Toward You
When we’re really interested in what someone has to say, we don’t just focus on them with our eyes, we turn our whole body toward them. If her shoulders are square on to you, she’s really focusing her attention on you.
11. She Remembers Things You Say
If she likes you, she’ll probably be listening to you. If you’ve mentioned the name of your aunt’s dog or your little brother’s birthday and she remembers, that’s proof she’s hanging on your every word and is genuinely interested in what you’re telling her, rather than zoning out.
Don’t judge us too harshly on this one because some of us have horrendous memories (we’re only human), but if she remembers little things you’ve said, she’s clearly keen.
12. It’s All In The Details
A lot of the time, girls are very detail-oriented. Big, showy gestures have their place (we’re never going to complain if a guy sweeps us off to Paris on a mini-break…), but when a girl wants to show that she likes someone, it’ll be through the little details rather than anything grand.
She might cook you dinner; she might buy you something small and silly; she might do something thoughtful for your birthday… If she does something that requires an investment of time rather than money, she’s definitely into you and trying to show it.
Like Her Back?
If she’s giving you all the right signals, you need to reciprocate to make sure she knows she’s not alone in this. She’ll be watching you closely for signs, just as you are her. Touch her, smile, laugh at her jokes, and then make plans to see her and stick to them.
No one’s willing to sign up for unrequited love, and even if she’s starting to like you, she’ll definitely need encouragement before she’ll let herself fall head over heels.
Katie splits her time between writing and translation. She writes about travel and self-care and never stays in one place for too long. She’s currently based in beautiful Cornwall, England, after long stints in Brazil and Mexico. She spends her free time trail running, exploring and devouring vegan food.