11 Things You Can Do To Stop Feeling So Bored With Life

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The idea of life being short is commonly pushed as a reason to embrace the now, to embrace whatever it is that one must do to find their happiness in the present moment.

Take this quote from Paulo Coelho for instance:

One day you will wake up and there won’t be any more time to do the things you’ve always wanted. Do it now.

But is life truly short?

It is true that life can be cut short due to tragedy, illness, or unexpected circumstances that hit you out of nowhere, but life isn’t going to be short for a lot of people.

It’s going to be long.

Decades long.

If you follow the traditional path of life, you’ll go to school for most of the first 20 years of your life, maybe more.

Then, you’ll hop into the job market where you will work to maybe buy a house, raise a family, and save for retirement for 30 or 40 years.

And then hopefully, you retire, and get to live out your silver and golden years in peace and comfort thanks to the work you put in over the course of your life.

At least, that’s supposed to be the plan – life doesn’t always work out the way we plan it.

But still, that’s a long time whether or not everything does go according to plan.

Doing the same thing over and over, day after day, week after week, month after month, year after year gets monotonous.

People need variety in their life, even those who are comfortable with a predictable, structured existence.

A lack of variety leaves people feeling bored and may eventually cause a breakdown in many or all aspects of their life.

This article will delve deep into this insidious boredom. It will explore what it feels like, what causes it, and how to overcome it.

So let’s jump right in, shall we?

What does it feel like to be bored with life?

Boredom with life is not like your run-of-the-mill boredom.

When life feels boring, you wake up in the morning to a world that is devoid of color, beauty, or stimulation.

You feel directionless. You stumble through the day, doing the things that society requires you to do, and then you go to bed and fall into a troubled, restless sleep.

Even the weekend – often a place of rest bite from the monotony of the working week – holds no joy for you.

Every part of you wants your life to change, but you can’t figure out how you want it to change, and you can’t bring yourself to change it.

You just know it has to… somehow.

Until then, you’re driftwood, floating on the sea of life, just bobbing along on the currents.

You may even have a life that others envy – a solid relationship, good job, happy kids, nice house, fancy possessions – but you’re still left wanting.

You may be loved by many and have others who depend on you, yet you feel there’s got to be more to life than this.

And this feeling isn’t constrained solely to the mind…

Boredom with life seeps into your body too. This can result in headaches, tightness of the muscles, digestion problems, and a general lack of energy among other things.

This what true, soul-crushing boredom feel like.

Is this boredom the same as depression?

The short answer is: not always.

You can experience this deep boredom without necessarily being depressed in the clinical sense.

And you can suffer from depression and not be completely and utterly bored with your day-to-day existence.

There is an overlap between the two groups and there can be an interaction between boredom and depression.

But depression can have more serious consequences, so if you are unsure whether you might be depressed, it is worth speaking to a doctor or mental health professional. 

What role does technology play in making us bored?

It’s interesting that, despite the plethora of options available to us for entertainment, we still find ourselves bored and disengaged.

We carry a device in our pocket that gives us access to immediate entertainment and the collective knowledge of humanity.

How is it that we are so bored with that at our fingertips?

Overstimulation is a contributor. An unending number of choices for entertainment can make them all seem lackluster and boring.

After a while, we find ourselves sitting on our couch, aimlessly scrolling through social media or trying to find the next thing to binge watch instead of getting out and engaging with life.

Much of the internet experience is based around instant gratification. As a result, the average attention span is shortening.

This makes it harder to engage in more difficult activities that may provide meaning, excitement, or real entertainment. It takes time to master any endeavor.

We have to be patient enough to build and pursue the things we want, whether that’s a career, a family, or a more meaningful life.

Why is it so important to have a meaningful life?

The idea behind chronic dissatisfaction is that a person is regularly unhappy with the way their life is going or their current trajectory.

We cannot escape all examples of everyday monotony. No one likes to stand in lines, waste their time sitting in traffic, or attempt to act interested in pointless meetings.

But these are sometimes a necessary part of moving through life.

The ugly truth is, no one is ever going to be happy all the time. That’s an unreasonable expectation that will lead to more misery and dissatisfaction.

Chronic dissatisfaction occurs when a person is discontented with their overall life experience.

Perhaps the person has lived a quiet life, bouncing from meaningless job to meaningless job, shallow friendship to shallow friendship, hollow relationship to hollow relationship.

They have a hard time finding joy in anything because it all feels so shallow and pointless.

That hollowness can fuel many unhealthy behaviors and illnesses – including drug and alcohol abuse, depression, and anxiety.

Sometimes it’s the other way around, where depression is actually the cause of not feeling any joy or happiness in one’s life.

Those empty feelings can cause a person to engage in self-destructive behavior just to try to break up the tediousness of their life.

Maybe they tear a relationship to the ground because they’re unhappy or sabotage other areas of their life to create some drama.

That does not mean that all downtime or being bored is a bad thing. It’s not.

One must take time to rest and recuperate before they plunge into another hobby, venture, or adventure. If you don’t, you risk burning yourself out and finding yourself back at the start. Pacing oneself is important.

What does having a meaningful life mean to you?

The idea of a meaningful life is one that provides personal satisfaction, a sense of accomplishment, and some degree of happiness.

Contrary to social media and vocal opinions, one should be wary of lumping happiness in with meaning. The two don’t always correlate.

As an example, perhaps there’s a social worker who is deeply entrenched in trying to help their clients improve their lives.

That may bring a great deal of accomplishment and satisfaction, but it’s hard to watch people suffer day in and day out.

It would be strange to think one would find their happiness in struggle and the darker side of life, but some people do. Some people thrive on it.

Some prefer to be in conflict and fighting for something that means something to them, to be a part of something larger than themselves. And in turn, that provides them some degree of personal satisfaction and happiness, but it would be unwise to expect it.

Being immersed in and watching suffering on a regular basis can easily spiral a person into depression if they can’t compartmentalize and take care of themselves well.

People find meaning in different ways.

For some, it will be working a career they are happy and excited with having. Others may find their meaning in cultivating and growing a loving family.

Some may find it in service to others or the vulnerable. Artists may find it in creation. Scientists may find it in discovery. There are an infinite number of routes, all of which are viable to some degree.

There is no set, singular path to happiness, meaning, and feeling content with life. Your path is going to be unique to you.

It may share similarities with other people, but it’s going to be your mission to figure out what path makes the most sense to you and pursue it.

That does not mean you have to go it alone or that no one can assist you on your path, just that you shouldn’t expect anyone else to be able to simply hand it to you in a neat package with a bow on top. That’s unlikely to happen.

How do I figure out what will provide meaning and happiness in my life?

Do stuff.

It’s as simple as that.

It sounds contrived, but the only way for you to truly figure out what provides happiness, contentment, and meaning in your life is to actively engage in life and do things.

“But what if I don’t like it?”

Then you don’t. And you move on to another thing.

Even when you do things you don’t necessarily like or enjoy, you’re broadening your knowledge and perspective of the world, which gives you the ability to connect with more people and facilitate a better understanding of what you do and do not like.

Chances are pretty good you’ll do quite a few things you don’t like before you find meaningful things that you do.

Or maybe you won’t! Maybe you’ll try something new and find it provides contentment and fulfillment.

“But I can’t afford it!”

It doesn’t have to be expensive. You don’t have to be jetting off on some $5,000 trip to some tropical paradise to find yourself.

Get a library card, read or listen to some books. Do some volunteer work with the disadvantaged or animals. Be a mentor to someone who is looking to find their way. Take an art course at a local community center.

These things are all relatively inexpensive ways to grow as a person and experience new things without taking selfies at Machu Picchu or being mobbed by con artists and street vendors in Cairo.

The most important thing is to do stuff. Anything is better than nothing. If it’s not working for you, change the stuff that you’re doing and try something new.

What about society’s expectations of me?

The idealists, the artists, the free thinkers may find themselves bored and confined with the sometimes rigorous structure of social conformity.

The problem is exacerbated by social pressure by one’s peers and groups to fit into an easy to understand, comfortable box.

The box is a comfortable place for some people. There are people out there who are more than happy to adopt the traditional perspective of what society expects from them because it offers a clear path, one that they believe will provide them with happiness and contentment.

The problem is that not everyone fits into that box.

Even worse, society likes to heap shame, criticism, and derision on anyone that decides to stand out from the crowd and question the status quo.

The unfortunate truth is that this is unlikely to change. The free spirits of the world do need to be able to shrug off hostile expectations and unwarranted criticisms if they hope to find their own meaning and contentment in life, because the beaten path just isn’t meant for them.

Maybe they’re meant to do more. Maybe they’re meant to bring light into dark places, encourage free thought, and help break down the social barriers that negatively impact other people.

A free spirit is likely to stagnate and wither in a repressive, structured environment like a corporate hierarchy or as a stay-at-home parent.

Can they do these things? Sure. People can do plenty of things they are not necessarily suited for. Should they? Well, that is a question that can only be answered by that individual.

Even if they do, they are going to need to be able to flex their creativity and spirit if they want to stay interested and engaged in life.

That may mean a yearly vacation to some place interesting, art or dance classes, or something to really encourage the core of their spirit and provide intellectual stimulation.

What can we do to break the boredom of life?

Before you can figure out the most appropriate ways to combat your boredom, you ought to examine the root causes of it.

Are you simply bored by the monotony of your life? Because you’re lonely? Because you don’t feel challenged?

Is your life boring because the people in your life bore you? Is there nothing in your future to get excited by?

Do you feel constrained by circumstances; unable to exert control over your life?

Have you got an untapped reservoir of energy and potential that needs an outlet?

Are you living an inauthentic life, trying to be someone that you’re not?

The more you can hone in on the cause(s) of your boredom with life, the more targeted you can be when you go out and engage with it.

Here are just a handful of things that you can try to alleviate your boredom.

1. Engage in volunteer or extracurricular work with an organization.

Volunteer work is an excellent way to branch out, meet new people, and contribute something positive to the world.

There are many organizations that need everything from casual to skilled labor. You might even be able to put your professional skills and knowledge to work for a meaningful cause.

Another option is to join a professional organization related to your field. It helps not only to break up the boredom and monotony, but to network with new individuals who you may be able to develop professional relationships with.

2. Learn a new set of skills.

There are a lot of ways to go about developing a new set of skills. The internet is packed with videos and guides on how to get started in different activities.

You may also decide that going back to college to take some additional courses is a good idea.

College coursework provides structure, guidance, and access to someone who is knowledgeable about the skill you are learning about.

Online college can make it easier to attend classes if you have a busy life.

3. Develop new friendships in social settings.

Where do you find new friends? There may be local activities going on where you can meet other people from your area or hobby groups that feature regular meet ups.

Religious individuals may want to attend regular services or activities hosted by their place of worship.

Local social media groups can also be a good place to find activities or meet ups.

4. Travel to a place that you’ve never been.

Travel doesn’t need to be far off and remote to help bring some excitement to your life.

It can be as simple as heading out of town to some function where you can have a good time and relax.

Maybe an out of town concert and a night in a hotel?

A trek to a national park or other natural attraction?

Or maybe save up some money and strike out a bit further afield for a bigger change of scenery.

Even a day long road trip can be a nice break from one’s day-to-day life.

5. Look for a new job or change careers.

It’s not unusual for people to eventually get bored with their choice of job or career.

They may even find that they made the wrong choice in what career to pursue and need to look at other options.

The choice to quit a job and/or change career paths is never a light one, but may be necessary to find more happiness and peace in your life.

Some are simply too demanding of time or emotional energy. Others may not provide enough stimulation or give you the room to grow that you really want.

If you’re not happy or satisfied with your career, it may be time to start looking for a change.

6. Get active and exercise.

Activity and exercise are so beneficial to one’s physical and mental health. Doctors are calling a sedentary lifestyle the new smoking in regard to health risks.

And with many jobs taking place behind a desk for a large part of the day, it’s no wonder that people are getting more depressed about their lives.

People need exercise to help boost feel good chemicals that your body produces when you engage in those activities.

Start small and set some goals to get out and get active. And if you are already active, set some stronger goals – like finishing a marathon or improving your capabilities.

7. Create some art.

The artists of the world are often driven to create in some way or another. There are a lot of people who get derailed because of the opinions of others or because life simply denies them the appropriate time.

An artist who has stopped creating should consider getting back into it. Art helps to flex the creative mind and provides a sense of pride and accomplishment in one’s work.

Join a healthy community of artists who practice the same medium and work on improving and finishing your works.

You don’t have to be great at it. Very few people are. The important thing is to embrace your art if it brings you happiness.

8. Spend more quality time with your loved ones and cut out toxic people.

It is a well-known fact that spending more quality time with your loved ones causes the mind to produce several feel good chemicals like endorphins.

It’s too easy to let one’s friendships and relationships slide with how busy life can be for everyone.

One must try to keep those relationships intact by making an effort to stay in touch with their friends and family.

That often means going to gatherings and things you don’t necessarily feel like or want to go to.

There’s a common thread of not wanting to be social or being too tired to participate, but if you fall into that pattern, life will leave you behind.

Attend things when you’re invited, or try to throw a party of your own if you don’t have much going on.

And do consider cutting toxic people out of your life if there are any. They are an intense drain on one’s happiness and peace of mind.

9. Find a purpose or a cause greater than yourself.

People like to belong. They also like to contribute to something bigger than themselves.

Finding a purpose or cause to align yourself and your skills with can provide a sense of pride and happiness in making a difference in the world.

That may sound easier said than done, but really there are a lot of movements and groups out there that are trying to make positive changes in the world that you can be a part of.

10. Set and pursue goals that will give you a sense of accomplishment.

Goal setting is an essential part of self-improvement and feeling as though one is accomplishing things in their life.

It’s easy to drift without aim or direction, but doing so deprives you of the ability to feel like you picked something you wanted to do and accomplish it, a feeling that can provide a nice hit of dopamine when you cross it off of your to-do list and gain momentum.

There are many approaches to goal setting, but generally one would want to set short, medium, and long-term goals for their life.

They might be related to your health, career, personal life, or hobbies.

11. Stop doing things that don’t excite you or bring you joy.

Earlier we spoke about trying new things to find those which bring you happiness and meaning.

But what about all the things you are doing right now that don’t deliver either of those feelings?

Consider stopping them.

This doesn’t mean you can shirk all your current responsibilities. After all, if you have others who depend on you to provide for and/or care for them, you must fulfill those commitments.

But look at your life and at the things you do and ask yourself whether they really mean anything to you.

Perhaps you shop just for the sake of shopping.

Or you watch the news every night just to fill the time.

Or maybe you party hard every Friday night simply because all your friends do it and you’ve always done it.

If something no longer feels worthy of your time, don’t do it.

Please note: it is important that you speak to a professional to identify if you are suffering from depression before you give up on things that may have once brought you joy. As stated earlier in the article, depression can be the reason you feel bored and joyless.

A life without boredom…

…is a life pursued with purpose. It doesn’t really matter what your purpose is, so long as you can find one.

The best way to find one is to just get out there and start doing things.

You may find that the things you choose to do don’t necessarily lead you to excitement or happiness, but they may provide you with the knowledge, experience, or people you need to step onto another path.

Don’t let malaise or depression derail you. Get back out there and keep trying.

And if you do find that it is exceptionally difficult or that you can’t find a direction on your own, it may be worthwhile to seek assistance from a certified mental health counselor or life coach.

Don’t hesitate to seek out help if you are having a hard time and aren’t sure what direction to go.

Still not sure how to stop being so bored with life? Speak to a life coach today who can walk you through the process. Simply click here to connect with one.

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)

Is life supposed to be boring?

There is nothing to say that life has to be boring, but most people will go through periods in their life that are considerably less exciting than other periods. It’s a feature of the human mind that we spend endless hours comparing things – in this case different experiences and different phases of our lives.

It is difficult to maintain a high level of mentally stimulating activity over a prolonged period of time. Some people can manage it, but for others there will be times when there is not enough going on in life to provide the excitement they crave.

Does life get boring as you get older?

Different phases of life have different elements that might make someone feel bored or energized. Some young people enjoy learning whilst others don’t, so some people may find school very boring. But being young also means you’ve got a lot of life and a lot of experiences ahead of you. With so many firsts to enjoy, life can feel very exciting in general.

As you get older and you do things again and again, their novelty wears off and this can make some things less enjoyable. Your work may be repetitive and less varied than your time in education, which can make it quite dull. And your social circle tends to shrink as you age, meaning you spend more time with the same people doing the same things.

You don’t have to accept that life will get more boring the longer it goes on. It’s up to you and your choices to keep things mentally stimulating. Within reason and within your financial means, you can choose to do things that you haven’t done before. Or you can do the same things but with a new group of people.

As you reach into retirement, or after your children have grown up and left home, you’ll likely have the period of your life with the most personal freedom. You should hopefully be more financially secure than when you were younger and with more free time to play with. This free time can be a curse if you struggle to fill it, or it can be a blessing if you use it to do things that stimulate your mind.

Is it normal to feel bored?

It is common to feel bored and to go through periods of boredom in your life. That’s not to say that it is ‘normal’ or that you should accept your boredom and not try to act to rectify it.

Whilst you shouldn’t beat yourself up about experiencing chronic boredom, you should realize the power you have to overcome it. Mental illness aside, there are no doubt many things that you could do that would give you pleasure and make you excited about life again.

So don’t equate the commonplace nature of boredom with it being the natural order of things.

Does routine make life boring?

When it feels as though your life is stuck on repeat, it can lead to an overwhelming sense of dullness. When every workday and weekend looks the same and every year follows the same pattern, the moments of joy and happiness can get lost in the mind.

Routines and habits can be incredibly helpful in organizing our lives and helping us to get things done, but when they aren’t balanced out with times of spontaneous activity, they can cause our minds to fog over with the weariness of repetition.

So it’s not a routine that makes for a boring life; it’s having no breaks from that routine in which to recharge your batteries. If you regularly escape from your habitual life, you can jolt your mind out of the trance it can find itself in when every day is Groundhog Day.

What other feelings relate to boredom with life?

Being bored with life may result in or be the result of other feelings or mental states such as apathy and indifference, lethargy and fatigue, anger and irritation, or detachment.

Often the relationship between these things is bidirectional, meaning one doesn’t necessarily cause the other but both feed back into one another.

Apathy and indifference is when you don’t feel a lot of emotion, interest, or concern about something or everything. If everything bores you, you are likely to be less concerned with life overall.

Lethargy and fatigue involve having a low level of physical and mental energy with which to tackle the day ahead of you. Boredom can drain you of your energy.

Anger and irritation involve you lashing out at others. When you are bored with life, you might experience heightened negative feelings toward other people or the situations you find yourself in.

Detachment occurs when you no longer feel a connection to someone or something. In a more general sense, feeling detached from life means to feel as though your actions are of no consequence.

How can I be content with my life?

Being content with life means not wishing that it was different to how it is. It doesn’t mean not wanting to grow as a person and experience new things but simply that you don’t want to live in some alternative present moment where you are having a different, more exciting experience.

Finding contentment in your life largely comes down to the mindset you adopt toward it. This involves not constantly focusing on all the negatives or the hardships you are experiencing and not ignoring or minimizing the good things you have to be thankful for. Things may not be perfect, but there’s a good chance that they are better than you give them credit for.

This ties in with the old adage that the grass is greener on the other side of the fence. You may observe the lives of other people or imagine a different life for yourself and be convinced that you’d be happier in that life. In reality, everyone faces challenges and everyone enjoys some good times – it’s how you approach the ups and downs that matters.

It also helps to remind yourself that many things in this life are transient. In fact, all things will come and go eventually. By clinging on to the past and wishing to be back there, you ignore the beauty of today. Likewise, if you can’t wait for your current difficult situation to be over, you will struggle to find enjoyment even in the little things during that period. And that period may not always end as soon as you would like it to, meaning you remain dissatisfied and, ultimately, bored with life.

I’m bored of the people in my life. What should I do?

If a part of your persistent boredom is due to the people you spend your time with, it can feel as though you can’t do anything about it. After all, you love and care for some of these people and want to keep them in your life – you just find them a little dull sometimes.

There are two things you can do. The first is to get your current relationships out of the rut they find themselves in. You don’t have to be arguing with someone all of the time for a relationship to have lost its sparkle. This will involve breaking out of the patterns of that relationship in terms of what you do together and the mindset you have about it.

Perhaps you always do the same thing with a particular set of friends and you always talk about the same subjects. Maybe they are quite negative about their lives and you are sick of hearing them complain about the same things week after week. Take some initiative in this group and organize to do something different and more exciting when you next get together. Do this regularly – make an agreement that at least once a month, you’ll all find something interesting and novel to do together.

Of course, if you have outgrown a particular friend or group, there’s no shame in distancing yourself from them if being in their company no longer brings you the joy or sense of belonging it once did.

In terms of your romantic relationship or the one you have with your family, you can be proactive here, too, and push to do things that are more fun for everyone. You can break free from your routine now and then and do something that’s completely different and at the limits of your comfort zone to really push you. Over time, you’ll notice a difference in the way you think about these relationships. They’ll no longer be sources of boredom; they’ll be sources of excitement.

The second thing you can do if you are bored with the people in your life is to change your mindset. Don’t blame them for your boredom. Don’t put the burden of your mental stimulation on their shoulders. It’s not their fault that you’re bored, and you can alter the way you think about them to reflect this.

It comes down to mistaking a feeling of comfort with a feeling of stagnation. These are two different things. Many long term relationships – whether romantic or family or friends – settle down into a pattern eventually. There is comfort in this and security. But knowing what to expect from your relationships is a double-edged sword. On the one hand, it’s good for your peace of mind to feel safe in those relationships. On the other hand, it takes away a potential source of exhilaration. Stability is less of a thrill, which is why some people thrive on drama and look for it or cause it as often as they can.

You don’t have to be a source of drama to change your perspective on your relationships. You can appreciate what you gain from having stable, loving relationships in your life. You can take responsibility for your boredom and be the driving force for positive change (as above).

How can I overcome the fear of missing out (FOMO)?

If you are bored because you feel like you are missing out on so many fun things, it’s the fear of missing out that you need to address. When you see people living more adventurous and exciting lives, it can taint the view you have of your own life. You might think that you are not making the most of the time you have and that you are failing at life because of this.

The truth is, very few people live their lives in states of constant fun and stimulation. Most people have to work to earn a living. Many people have to deal with the day-to-day errands of family life. And just because they go away on city breaks every other weekend, doesn’t mean they are completely fulfilled.

If you compare your life to what you see of other people’s lives on social media, you will always end up seeing your life in an unfavorable light. Nobody posts themselves cleaning the toilet or taking the kids to gym class on social media. They only post their most like-worthy moments. So stop telling yourself that you must be missing out on life because other people are having way more fun – remember that they have to put up with less exciting aspects of life too.

How can I deal with the disappointment of my life so far?

Are there specific things that you are disappointed by in life? Maybe you didn’t get the grades you needed to go to university and haven’t managed to pursue your dream career. Or perhaps you’re still single in your mid-30s and this is getting you down.

Disappointment is in the mind and that’s the first place to tackle it. The things you need to consider include whether you are attaching your ‘success’ or lack thereof to material things or being in a good job or how many countries you’ve visited. Whose standards are you trying to live up to? Do you have a smaller house than your peers and think you’re failing because of it? Do you feel others judge you harshly because of what you have achieved in life?

First things first, you need to break the link in your mind between your self-worth and the successes you have. You are not defined by what you achieve.

Secondly, you ought to pay more attention to the things you are good at and the people and things you do have in your life. By practicing gratitude, you can turn your mindset around and stop being so down on yourself.

Thirdly, you ought to stop placing so much importance on how you think other people view you. If someone wants to judge you or look down on you, that’s their problem, not yours. They can do what they like and you can ignore them entirely if you choose to. Don’t give them power over your feelings, they don’t deserve it!

Lastly, you can tackle disappointment of the past by setting goals for the future and proactively taking the steps required to achieve those goals. Use your disappointment as motivation to change your life in a positive way. Even if that disappointment is unjustified, it can energize you to prove your doubters wrong – including you!

How can I exert more control over my life?

Control comes down to one thing: choices. You make choices each and every day and those choices dictate how your life unfolds. Most choices don’t have a big impact, but some do and it is these that you need to focus on most.

When you feel more in control of your life, you’ll find your boredom melting away. Empowerment is an antidote to the malaise you feel.

You don’t have to be passive and only make the choices that life forces you to make. You can be proactive and make choices that better your life in some way, even when continuing with the status quo is a possible option.

Look at the areas of your life that bore you the most and then consider all the possible ways that you could do something about them. Hate your job? Could you find a new one in the same field? Could you move career paths? Could you start your own business?

Are you fed up with where you live? Do you think a new horizon might improve your mental well-being? Where would you like to move to? How realistic is that? Could you afford it? Could you find work there?

When you look for ways to exert more control over your life, you’ll be sure to find some.

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