Big consequences are often the result of many small decisions, for better and worse. The small things we do in life add up and affect us in ways we don’t always consider. For example, eating healthily isn’t something you just do once and you’re done. You have to do it most of the time you eat for it to be beneficial.
Mental health is the same way. There are so many small choices that you make which have a much bigger impact on your mental health than you realize. The more positive choices you make, the better your mental health will be. With that in mind, remember to consider these small habits as you go through your day.
1. Checking your phone when you wake up.
Your phone is a gateway to the rest of the world, for better and worse. Social media is often a dumpster fire of bad news, people behaving badly, and rage-bait designed to keep people clicking. Bombarding yourself with all of that negativity is not a good way to start the day! It amplifies your anxiety first thing in the morning, and those feelings will follow you for the rest of the day.
This was a habit that I had to break because I didn’t want my thoughts in the morning polluted with the agendas of everyone else. Yes, there are a lot of negative things in the world, and we can’t close our eyes to them. However, there’s also no reason to dump it straight into your brain the moment you wake up. It’s just unnecessary, and it fuels anxiety and depression.
2. Comparing your life to others.
Social media can tear down your mental health without you even realizing it. As you scroll, most people will be quietly making judgments and assessments, comparing themselves to what they see on their feed. It’s not even something we willfully set out to do, but rather just a habit and part of human nature. For example, you may scroll past someone buying a new car and reflexively think, “I wish I could afford a new car.” That’s another chip away from your personal happiness.
Of course, it’s not just through social media that we make these comparisons, but it’s certainly exacerbated the problem. In years gone by, we wouldn’t have had such vast and constant exposure to the lives of others; we’d likely only be comparing ourselves to those in our immediate social circle or the odd newspaper article about a glamorous celebrity. It’s just one more reason why reducing your social media usage can have significant benefits for mental health.
3. Saying “yes” when you shouldn’t.
Boundaries are important for preserving your mental well-being and a peaceful life. You can’t go through life being a people pleaser because it feels polite in the moment, or because you don’t want to let someone down. Resentment and burnout build if you don’t say “no” to the things that aren’t right for you. And those negative feelings amplify with time as you say “yes” to more things that aren’t good for you.
People who value you will respect your “no” and find a way to accommodate you. Not everyone responds well to boundaries, but those who don’t are the ones who are likely taking advantage of your kindness anyway.
4. Avoiding difficult conversations.
Avoidance of problems is a surefire way to lower the quality of your thoughts and emotional well-being. When problems aren’t promptly tackled with the relevant parties, we end up negatively ruminating on them and building resentment instead. Resentment that often explodes out of us eventually, in much worse ways than if we’d just tackled the difficult conversation calmly when it first arose.
The reality is that we all have difficult circumstances and conversations we need to have. You don’t want to encourage a habit of avoidance in yourself because habits can be so hard to break. Instead of running from these situations and conversations, step right up and have them. It’s like ripping a bandage off: the slower you are, the more it’s going to hurt.
5. Consistently sacrificing a good night’s sleep.
A late night here and there isn’t a big deal until it becomes a consistent pattern. There are few things more important than good sleep for your mental health.
The National Institute of Neurological Disorders and Stroke informs us that the brain produces mood-balancing hormones during the deepest stages of sleep that it will use in the coming day. If you aren’t in alignment with your circadian rhythm or you’re consistently keeping odd hours, it throws off your brain’s ability to regulate your emotions, which can just make every day worse.
6. Dismissing and ignoring your emotions.
It’s tempting to dismiss and suppress your emotions for several reasons. You may feel like your emotions just aren’t that important, or you may just feel like you’re too busy to take the time to manage your emotions. This is a small mistake that can have big ramifications further down the road.
Yes, sometimes we just need to suck it up and get on with life. However, when you do that, you need to come back later and deal with those emotions. If you don’t, they can pile up into a much bigger problem that’s going to explode eventually. Plus, you can accidentally create a habit of unhealthy emotional suppression, and habits this this are very hard to break.
7. Not asking for help when you need it.
It feels strong to convince yourself that you should handle everything yourself. In fact, depending on your life, you may be in a position where you have been handling everything yourself just out of necessity. The problem is that this behavior isolates you.
People need other people. Helping allows us to build relationships, demonstrate love, and take some of the burden of the load of life off those we care about. People who are in the habit of doing everything themselves find it difficult to unlearn that behavior. But discovering how to ask for help without feeling awkward or burdensome is one of the greatest things you can do for your mental (and physical) health.
8. Spending time with the wrong people.
There’s an old saying that “you are the sum of the five people you spend the most time with.” There’s a lot of truth to that statement, because if you spend your time with miserable people, you’re going to find yourself miserable. However, if you spend your time with joyful, hopeful people, you’re more likely to find positivity in your days.
You can’t waste your precious time around people who drain you emotionally, bring you down, and don’t want to see you shine. No matter how ironclad you imagine yourself to be, their attitude will wear on you, chipping away at your own joy and happiness.
9. Regularly skipping physical exercise or movement that works for your unique situation.
It may not seem like a big deal to skip physical exercise, but the Mayo Clinic informs us that a sedentary lifestyle fuels depression and anxiety. The human body is built to thrive on exercise and effort. Exercise causes the body to produce several hormones that help you with your mental and physical health. And, once you’re in the habit, you can sometimes tell the difference when you skip out on a day, here and there.
Of course, this doesn’t mean you have to strive for a punishing regime that just doesn’t work for you. The best kind of exercise is the one you will do consistently. So, if that means a gentle walk or even chair or bed pilates, so be it. Those with chronic conditions and pain will likely need very gradual, gentle exercises if they are to be sustainable. The key is to move and stretch your body every day.
Final thoughts…
A healthy life is the result of many small choices made regularly. We have to choose to eat right, sleep right, act right, hang out with the right people, and make good choices every single day. If you don’t, you’ll find that your attitude will start to slip, and you’ll generally feel worse. It’s normal. The environment plays a big role in our mental health.
The good news is that these small habits can be simple to change if you devote the energy to changing them. It may not be easy to consistently make good decisions, but it is simple. Just look at your life and start changing the things that make you feel bad. Replace them with things that make you feel good, and just keep doing that.