24 Tips For Having A Great Second Date (And Getting A Third)

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The best thing about second dates is that you already know this person likes you, a little bit at the very least.

However, a second date doesn’t come with any promises.

So how can you make sure that you get the third date, and potentially more?

Use the following tips to have a great second date!

1. Plan an entirely different date.

Don’t stage a rerun of your first date, even if it went well. Do something entirely different.

While choosing a different restaurant might be a good idea, it’s even better to choose a totally different location and activity.

Doing something different will keep things interesting and help you gain a fresh perspective on each other.

Generally speaking, the second date shouldn’t be as formal as the first one.

2. Pick a place where you can talk.

It’s just as important to talk on the second date as it is on the first, so don’t choose a date idea that would prevent you from doing that.

Pick a place and an activity that will allow you to talk to each other for a good proportion of the date.

Don’t forget that you’re still getting to know this person, and learning more about each other is currently the number one goal of your date.

3. Choose something that you can bond over.

Maybe you talked about how you both like bowling or horse riding during your first date. Now’s your opportunity to use that fact to your advantage!

Think about the things you’ve talked about on your first date and see if any of the common interests you have could be turned into a date.

Incorporating something that your date mentioned they like will earn you some brownie points.

Even if you just know the genre of music that they like, take them somewhere where they’ll be able to hear that type of music.

4. Dress more casually.

While you were trying to look your best for your first date, you should try to look more like you normally do for your second.

Your date has already seen how great you can look when you bring your A-game; now they’d like to see how you’d look if they were in a relationship with you and saw you every day.

You can always highlight your good parts and hide your bad parts, but maintain a normal, casual, and natural look.

5. Greet them with a hug.

What better way to start your second date than with a smile and a hug?

You can even give them a cute little kiss on the cheek.

By starting your date with a little intimacy, you will break the ice and make you both feel more relaxed and comfortable around each other.

Of course, if you already had a real kiss on the first date, a kiss on the cheek would seem like just a friendly one. So maybe you could kiss at the beginning of the second one!

If you don’t want to risk it though, you can’t go wrong with a smile and a hug.

6. Bring up something from the first date.

One of the best tips to impress on a second date is to remind your date of the first one and the fact that you were genuinely listening to what they had to say.

Maybe there was something they mentioned that was too personal to discuss further during the first date, but now might be the right time for it.

Or talk about something that happened on the first date. Perhaps you spilled your drink—you could joke that you brought a child’s sippy cup with you this time.

7. Ask a lot of questions.

Make sure to ask your date questions and keep them talking about themselves. It feels good when you’re talking to a person who shows an interest in what you’re saying.

Just don’t sound like a detective. Be curious about the things that matter to them and ask about things that matter to you too.

What is important to you that could help you know for sure that you want a third date with this person?

For example, while you might not want to talk about marriage and children, there’s nothing wrong with asking them about the kind of relationship they’d like to have. It’s good to know that you’re on the same page.

8. Open up more.

As you ask your date questions, they’ll open up to you more and more. This is a good thing, but it means that you need to open up a little too.

Don’t open up too much because it’s still only a second date, but open up more than you did on the first one.

Talking about your childhood or your hopes and dreams can be a good way to let them in a little. Tell stories—they are a great way to keep your date interested and to share parts of your life so far.

9. Don’t get too comfortable.

Opening up can sound great, but you might open up a bit more than you should, so don’t get too comfortable.

This person is not yet your partner, just someone who might become your partner after a while, and they’re paying close attention to you to see whether that’s something they might want.

It might feel like you have known each other way longer than you actually have, so keep in mind that you shouldn’t yet be opening your heart and soul to them.

10. Don’t talk about your ex.

Your date might want to know about your past and might ask about other relationships you’ve had.

But you should avoid talking specifically about your ex because you don’t want your date to think that you’re still hung up on them.

You especially don’t want to talk badly about your ex or you might give your date a more negative opinion of you. Give them the facts and move on.

For instance, if they ask you about your last relationship, saying how long ago it ended and how long it lasted is pretty much all the info they’re looking for.

11. Flirt with your date.

We assume that there’s a lot of flirting on the first date, but that isn’t always the case.

So, use this chance to flirt and really show your interest.

Make eye contact, smile often, make them laugh, actively listen while they talk, and ask questions to keep them talking.

The point is to make them feel like they’re the only one who matters in the world right now.

You can even tease them a little, but make sure not to offend them. Make them happy and consider putting the moves on them so that they know you’re serious…if it feels right.

12. Make physical contact.

Don’t forget to touch your date because this is a big part of flirting.

Don’t be inappropriate, but touching their shoulder while they talk or holding their hand at some point is a good idea.

Or lean in while they talk and touch their arm when they make you laugh. Put your hand on their back as you enter the place where you’ll have your date.

Note: even if they like you, they might not enjoy being touched, so if you notice that they’re not comfortable with it, don’t touch them anymore. Some people are not into public displays of affection, and you need to respect that.

13. Don’t let them get bored.

Asking questions like “Am I boring you?” or “Are you having a good time?” could make you sound needy or even annoying.

Still, you need to make sure that your date doesn’t get bored, so try to read the signs.

If you notice that they’re getting a little bored, suggest that you continue your date somewhere else. For instance, if you were at a restaurant, head to a bar where you can get drinks and enjoy the change of scenery.

14. Don’t make assumptions.

No matter what feelings you might be developing for this person after your first date and subsequent messages or calls, don’t assume they’re not dating anyone else.

So, before you change your relationship status and assume that the deed is done, ask yourself whether they have given you any reason to think that.

You are only on your second date, so things could go anywhere from here. Don’t come with too many expectations and let things develop naturally.

15. Read their body language.

Your date probably won’t tell you how they feel about you just yet, and it’s not a great idea to ask, so you’ll need to read the signs.

Pay attention to their body language and try to make them feel relaxed if they seem closed off or uncomfortable.

You could also help them realize that you’re paying attention by mirroring their body language. Or they might mirror your body language, which is a good sign!

As long as their arms and legs aren’t crossed, and they’re open to your gentle touches, your date is going well.

16. Don’t stay in one place.

Even if your date doesn’t seem bored, consider switching things up and moving to a different location at some point during the date.

Maybe you could start your date by going to a bar and take a walk in the park after a few drinks.

Where you go and what you do doesn’t really matter, just that you change locations and do different things, even if it means trying out two different meals in two separate restaurants.

The walk between locations sometimes offers you a little more privacy than a bar or restaurant.

17. Let it last longer.

While your first date might not have lasted long, this one should definitely last longer.

Reaching the second date means that you are both already at least a little bit interested and have an idea of what you can expect.

Maybe you could make your date last longer by planning some outdoor activities. For instance, you could see some famous sights, go to an amusement park, or go on a hike.

A change of scenery, and combining indoor and outdoor activities will make your date seem longer and more fun.

18. Give them compliments.

The second date is a great time to give the other person a few compliments.

Make sure that your compliments are genuine though, because you don’t want your date to think that you’re just trying to seduce them with lies.

Let them know what you like about their appearance, but compliment them on their personality much more than on their looks.

19. Be a good listener.

Being a good listener is important on dates, and you can show that you’re listening by mentioning something that your date has said.

Maybe they rescheduled your first date because their brother had a birthday party, so you could ask how the party went.

Asking follow-up questions also proves that you were listening, so if they say that the party went great, ask whether there’s any cake left!

Showing your date that you’re a good listener will help you make a good impression.

20. Make plans for the next date.

The only guaranteed way to get a third date on the second one is to schedule it right then and there.

Mentioning something that you can do next time and making plans for the third date right away is a surefire way to find out whether your date is interested in seeing you again.

Don’t start with this conversation at the beginning of the date, but if the opportunity occurs and something that you could do together comes up in conversation, try to schedule the third date.

You can also bring this up if your date mentions that they’re having a great time or that they’d like to see you again.

21. Kiss (if you’d both like to).

There’s no rule for when two people should kiss during dating, but it most often happens during the first three dates.

So, if you didn’t kiss on your first date, you might want to go for it at the end of the second date if it seemed to go well.

Maybe you felt some chemistry during your conversations, but a kiss could help you determine whether you’re really attracted to each other.

You might be imagining the guy on the date leaning in for a kiss, but don’t hesitate to initiate it if you are a girl!

22. Send a text afterward.

If you follow these tips, you should hopefully have a great second date, so don’t let it end without letting your date know that you had a good time.

Send a text after the date to reassure them that you’re interested and hope to see them again.

Mention the third date if you’ve scheduled it, and wish them good night if it’s that sort of time.

23. Come prepared.

If you have read all the tips so far, you’ll probably be quite prepared already, but it’s worth mentioning anyway.

You need to prepare for a second date if you want to increase your odds of getting a third date.

If you decide to just go with the flow and see what happens, you might not have such an amazing date as you can have if you follow these tips.

24. Try some of these second date ideas.

So, you’re as ready as you can be for your second date, but what should you do on it? Here are some ideas.

  • Take a salsa class
  • Visit a karaoke bar
  • Take a train to a city or beach a little way away
  • See a comedy show
  • Play board games at a pub
  • Take a cooking class
  • Visit a jazz club
  • Take a pottery class
  • Go to an outdoor concert or play
  • Try archery or axe throwing
  • Go bowling
  • Have a go at an escape room
  • Play crazy golf

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About The Author

Ana Vakos enjoys writing about love and all the problems that come with it. Everyone has experiences with love, and everyone needs dating advice, so giving these topics more attention and spreading the word means a lot to her.