Intelligence is a more challenging metric to quantify than many people realize. We think of smart people and conjure images of ivory towers, academia, and disconnection. It’s even worse when you look at intelligent leaders and realize they have no idea what the people in the trenches are dealing with.
To cross paths with a down-to-earth intellectual is a blessing because you can have some wonderful, respectful conversations with them. But how do you know when you’re talking to a down-to-earth intellectual? Here are 8 giveaway behaviors.
1. They listen more than they speak.
A wise, down-to-earth person understands that other people have a lot to contribute. We can learn so much from each other if we will just close our mouths and listen without judgment. Listening without judgment is a difficult thing to do if you haven’t made an active effort to learn how to do it.
As we listen, we are often trying to make sense of what the person is saying through our interpretation. The problem is that we can’t fully conceptualize another person’s experiences. Let me give you an example from my own life. I’m on the autistic spectrum. Like many autistic people, it can be really challenging for me to empathize and connect with people in the “typical” way. I don’t lack empathy; that’s a misconception about autism. I just show it differently. As a result, I often feel alone, even in a room full of people.
Over the years, as I tried to connect with people, I always tried to follow the advice, “Well, what if you were in their shoes?” to try to connect with empathy. But that doesn’t work for me, because my brain doesn’t empathize in a neurotypical way. All I managed to do was isolate myself further by throwing in context and inference to what I was hearing, rather than just listening and receiving.
I needed to stop judging what I was taking in and accept that this person was relating their story to me in a way that made sense for them, even if it didn’t make sense to me. So, I came to understand that I needed to spend more time listening, and less time talking, and let me tell you, it made a huge difference.
2. They can explain complex ideas in a simple way.
As a writer, few things get me heated more than literary snobbery. There are a lot of “intellectuals” out there who feel like they need to flex their thesaurus to prove to everyone how smart they are. Then, when people don’t understand them, they get all whiny about how other people aren’t smart enough, or need to read more, or whatever.
It’s infuriating because you don’t know that person’s story. You don’t know why they don’t know college words, and can’t read at an overly complicated level. Maybe their school district was underfunded, so they didn’t get the education they deserved? Maybe they had to drop out to take care of their family? Maybe they have ADHD or a mental health issue that makes it hard to focus? We don’t know what that person’s story is, and it’s not anyone’s place to judge them.
It’s even more annoying because, hey, you’re the writer, speaker, educator, whatever. If the audience can’t understand what you’re talking about, that’s a failing of yours, not the audience’s. You’re the educator; learn to communicate better. No one’s better than anyone else because they got to college. Educating is not about ego; it’s about understanding, so you have to use language that your audience can understand.
3. They take responsibility for their mistakes.
Mistakes aren’t seen as a threat to pride for down-to-earth, intelligent people. Instead, they view mistakes as an opportunity to learn and grow. A willingness to take responsibility when you make mistakes demonstrates intelligence and humility, respecting the way other people are affected. As Psychology Today shares, that communicates to others that you are an approachable, trustworthy person.
The more you do this, the easier it gets. After a while, when you make a mistake, it’s not challenging at all to admit that you’re wrong and then try to fix it. There are no downsides to that. It builds intimacy, fosters respect, and acknowledges your differences from other people. Don’t be afraid to admit when you’re wrong, if you’re wrong. Humility goes a long way.
4. They stay curious about life around them and everyday things.
Intelligence isn’t limited to books and academic learning. Instead, curiosity is often the driving force of intelligence. They simply want to know more things about the world around them. When you have a person who is down-to-earth, they are more likely to look around them to make sense of their world.
They may find wonder in things like individual moments, nature, people, or life’s patterns. Philosophy may be an interest, because even though philosophy is academic in nature, it’s all about how to live life. There are so many philosophers who have pointed out that knowledge doesn’t mean anything if you don’t use it.
5. They offer equal treatment and respect to all.
Every person has value, whether they are a server at a restaurant or the CEO of a company. To value people based on their status or titles demeans them as a person. They are valuable, regardless of how important they are or what they can do for you.
Wise people in positions of power already know that others will try to use their power to their own advantage, so they look for that kind of behavior. They also understand how important the people “below” them are. Unfortunately, wisdom isn’t as common as we would like it to be, but the reality is, it would be impossible for the world to function without people like janitors and street cleaners keeping things orderly.
Intelligent people who are down to earth understand they aren’t any better than anyone else, and that you can learn a lot from others, regardless of their perceived status.
6. They don’t brag about their intelligence.
Bragging about one’s intelligence demonstrates a total lack of emotional intelligence and social acumen. If you’re smart, other people are going to notice through your actions, insights, and problem-solving methods. Furthermore, wise, down-to-earth people understand that arrogance will only blind them to knowledge. Because if you think you’re so intelligent, or that you’re more intelligent than those you are talking to, you may be less likely to listen to someone who knows what they’re talking about.
Boasting is an ego-driven behavior that asks for other people to pay attention and boost your self-esteem. Not only is it not healthy for you, but it loudly screams that you’re insecure about yourself, your ability, and your intellect.
7. They value emotional intelligence as strongly as intellect.
Emotional intelligence opens doors and prevents many fights from happening. An emotionally intelligent person understands how feelings drive behavior, relationships, and choices. Instead of using it as a tool to harm or dominate, they employ emotional intelligence with empathy to connect with people.
Intelligence doesn’t mean a whole lot if the people you’re trying to connect with won’t listen to you. For example, let’s say you have an important message you want to deliver to people. Well, if you make them angry, they aren’t going to be listening to hear the message. They’re going to be waiting to respond and retaliate.
8. They stay humble about all the things they don’t know.
The more you learn about a subject, the more you realize that there is so much more to learn. It happens that way because once you gain one piece of knowledge, that spurs your brain to wonder what other knowledge may be there. Learning helps you ask better, more informed questions that help you get closer and closer to a meaningful result.
But you have to be secure enough in yourself to accept that you don’t know everything, and let this wisdom come to you when it does. That might be a random feeling, or it could be another person who comes into your life to teach you something valuable.
Final thoughts…
It’s a blessing to cross paths with an intelligent, down-to-earth person. Their natural curiosity and inquisitive nature often make for excellent conversations, so long as you keep asking them questions. They will have gained a lot of knowledge and experience that you may not have otherwise found. The relationship is symbiotic because you can offer your knowledge and experience up to them, too.
And if you do struggle with feeling superior about your intelligence, try doing things you don’t know much about. That will clearly demonstrate your shortcomings and hopefully make it easier to make a positive change.
