If you’re in a relationship with an Alpha woman, you can be certain of a number of things, least of which will be that things are unlikely to ever be boring.
She has chosen to be with you, so obviously you’re interesting enough to have captured her attention (and her heart), neither of which she gives out easily, so that’s already a boon in your favor.
Below are eight things that your Alpha lady will bring to your partnership, whether you’re ready for them or not. Brace yourself.
1. Zero Bullsh*t Or Drama
As has been established, Alpha women have neither the time, nor the patience for games or passive-aggressive nonsense.
As such, you know you’re never going to have to deal with her giving you the silent treatment, or slamming doors, or pulling the whole “if you don’t know what you did wrong, I’m not going to tell you” crap that a lot of people inflict on one another.
She’s also unlikely to hold a grudge, so when you two quarrel, you can resolve issues there and then and move on, as she’s not the type to keep rehashing old ugliness forever just for the sake of drama. Once it’s over, it’s over. End of.
If you’ve ever been in a relationship in which you haven’t been able to depend upon your partner to really be there for you when you needed them, then it’s understandable that you might be a bit wary about truly trusting your Alpha partner.
Well, fear not: you can count on her.
Alpha women value and appreciate integrity, and often hold themselves to a much higher standard than they would others.
If you need her, she’s there for you. If she makes a promise, she will keep it unless she’s incapacitated. If it’s her turn to pick up the kids, or if she agreed to attend your cousin’s accordion recital, she’ll be there.
Furthermore, you can feel secure in the knowledge that if she has made a commitment to be your partner, that means she is your partner in all ways.
She will hold her own – whether in terms of finances or home maintenance – and is unlikely to ever allow inequality to seep into any aspect of your partnership.
3. Sincerity, Not Neediness
You realize that she’s with you because she wants to be with you, and not because she needs to be, right?
You may have some insecurities about being with such a powerful creature, but guess what? She chose you. She doesn’t NEED you.
She’s not desperate for a partner, she’s not settling with just anyone so that she’s not alone: she’s just fine flying solo, and would rather be alone than with someone she’s not perfectly happy with.
This isn’t a woman who’s going to whine when you go out with your friends because she misses you when you’re gone for an hour, nor is she unable to function without you being her pillar of support.
She might need you to be there for her during times of crisis, as she would be there for you, but it’s as an equal. Not a ragdoll desperate to be carried and coddled.
4. Encouragement And Challenge
Remember what we said above regarding zero BS? That includes allowing you to make up lame excuses about why you’re not pursuing your goals.
This woman is aware of your potential and knows what you’re capable of: traits that likely drew her to you to begin with.
If you find yourself in a slump, discouraged, and lacking motivation to pursue a dream or other pursuit, she will be the torch bearer who keeps the flame burning under your backside to keep you going.
If you’ve always dreamed of being the knight in shining armor to a damsel in distress, that’s not what you’re going to find in this partnership.
Your Alpha woman isn’t a princess in need of saving: she’s a queen who saves herself, and will set sh*t on fire in her wake if need be.
You’re unlikely to get a call in the middle of the night because she needs you to come and pick her up from some kind of weird situation, though if she’s pregnant, she MIGHT ask you to drive her to the hospital when her contractions have started.
Her bag will already be packed, however, so you won’t need to worry about that. Oh, and the baby seat will already be installed in your car, because she will have taken care of that too.
6. Awareness Of What She Wants, Plus Reciprocation
Your Alpha woman has a pretty solid awareness of what she likes, whether it’s a moderately toasted bagel with just a bit of onion cream cheese on it, or a specific position when you’re being intimate.
Particularly the latter.
Not only does this lady know what makes her squee, she has no qualms whatsoever about telling you what’s needed to make it happen.
Just as awesomely, Alpha women tend to enjoy giving as much as receiving, so you can be quite certain that if you tell her what you like in turn, she’ll oblige enthusiastically.
In a relationship with an Alpha woman, then, you have her support and her strength in whatever life may throw at you.
This isn’t a woman who will back away from difficulty: she’ll be by your side through the hard times, be that through illness, family deaths, emotional hardship, or any other number of trials you might face.
She’s not the type to cut and run when things get real, but will, instead, stand up and face whatever you’re facing, as your partner.
She might even yell at your boss for you, if that’s needed. Just sayin’.
This one has to be said, as it’s extraordinarily important when it comes to a relationship with an Alpha female.
We’ve reiterated how much this lady values integrity, and honesty in the relationship – and with her – is just as vital.
When you’re involved with a woman like this, know that you’re not just going to find out one day that things haven’t been working for a while, or that she’s been getting jiggy with your boss behind your back.
If there are issues in your relationship that need to be worked on, she’ll be honest and forthright with you about them so you can address them properly and work on them together.
If you balk at this, she’ll bring it up again, and insist that things be tended to. She won’t just drop the subject, but will do what needs to be done in order to sort things out…
But if it turns out that she’s the only one who’s making a sincere effort to enact change, she will walk away.
It’s just as important that you’re honest with her, regardless of what the issue is. If you’re upset, or unhappy, or just have something to address as a couple, lay it out on the table so it can be dealt with.
She’s not a fragile flower who will cry at the drop of a hat: she’s with you for a reason, and will work with you to sort out what needs to be sorted to make the relationship work.
Just be honest with her, always.
She’ll know if you’re hiding something from her, and if you ever lie to her or break her trust, it’s over: not only will she lose respect for you, but she’ll never be able to trust you again.
Catherine Winter is a writer, art director, and herbalist-in-training based in Quebec's Outaouais region. She has been known to subsist on coffee and soup for days at a time, and when she isn't writing or tending her garden, she can be found wrestling with various knitting projects and befriending local wildlife.